Do you have a personal goal that you want to achieve in 2021?
Even with COVID-19 still looming over us, many people are getting excited for the new year. Are you one of them? I don’t think there’s anyone who can’t wait to be done with 2020, right? What a year this has been.
If 2020 hasn’t kicked you in the butt so much that you can’t even think of making a New Year’s resolution. . . If you’re ready to get back on that horse, so to speak – you’ve come to the right article.
Because, I’ll show you how you can finally start conquering that change you want to see in yourself. No matter what it is and no matter how many times you’ve tried to achieve it already through the years.
Here’s the video that goes along with this post:
One thing I want to say right up front is to remember that this goal is for you. Make it really personal. The start of a new year is always a fun time to talk about our new year’s resolutions with family, friends, neighbors and co-workers, for instance.
We all have a good laugh about resolutions lasting like a month, right? The scene everyone can picture in their minds is gyms being packed full in January and then deserted ghost towns in February. The way I always look at it – is that a month was still better than nothing. (Unfortunately, most gyms are pretty much ghost town these days – or close to it.)
But, our resolutions don’t only have to be ones that we’d share with our friends and co-workers. Don’t get me wrong. The standard ones like losing weight, exercising and eating healthier are all great. But, each of us is so much more than this. Your goal can be something you’d never want to share with anyone. Maybe you’d share it with your best friend, boyfriend or husband. Maybe not.
What if you decided you want to be more spiritual in the new year? Kinder? More confident? Be more patient with your young children? Tell your boyfriend or spouse you love him more often? Go for that dream career? Learn salsa dancing? Can you think of a good juicy personal one?
I think having goals that are so personal you wouldn’t want to share them by the virtual watercooler at work is a good thing. It reminds me of what a doctor told my husband recently. We’ve all heard this plenty of times. But, he said it that day with such passion. He said this isn’t a trial run. We get one shot at this life. Make it the best you can!
The First Secret Technique to Finally Achieving a New Year’s Resolution
Ok, so you have your goal. The very first thing you need to do is to realize, I mean really let it sink in, that EVERYTHING starts on the inside. More specifically – in your subconscious mind.
This is where you have to head to (funny pun right there – lol!) to start achieving that goal.
Let me give you a usual scenario: A person wants to eat healthier. She decides to make it her New Year’s resolution. So, she gets on Amazon and orders a new cookbook. She goes online and researches the latest info on nutrition. She cleans out every inch of her fridge and cupboards. She heads to the market, maybe even Whole Foods, to get shopping. Etc., etc.
You get the picture. BAAANNNTTT! (Insert annoying game show buzzer here.)
This is what most people do. And this is why new year’s resolutions are such a funny cliche. Because this doesn’t work in the long run. And many times even in the short run.
The first place she needs to go is inside. Corny, I know. But, since I’m now officially a ‘happiness’ author, I’m in the thick of corny. My poor kids.
Remember the old country song: “Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places”? We can sing: “Looking to Achieve Your Goals in All the Wrong Places”. She’s got to get to her programming. To all the beliefs, thoughts, images, feelings, and habits stored in her subconscious mind.
I know this might sound intimidating. You might be ready right about now to click off and find an article with advice that sounds a little bit easier – and faster. And maybe not as weird. But, I’m telling you, this stuff is so simple when you learn some basics.
And as far as weird goes, sure this stuff is different. This is what stops so many people. But, how’s the ‘same old, same old’ working out for them?
So, let’s get into it. For giggle’s, let’s say that the goal in the example above of eating healthier is your New Year’s resolution. How do you begin to get inside your subconscious mind?
Let me preface this by saying all those ‘outside’ things she’s doing – like the new cookbooks, meal plans, shopping for healthy food, cleaning out the cupboards, etc. – all good. But, you’ve got to do this ‘inside’ work too. That’s what I’m all about.
The first step is to uncover your hidden beliefs on this subject. We formed most of our beliefs when we were very young. We came up with conclusions about ourselves, about other people, and about the world back then. The problem is that we were very young and naive. We formed these conclusions from our little mind’s perspective. That’s why many of our negative beliefs are wrong. Yet, we’re still operating out of them.
We can all relate to this in one way or another. Beliefs like: “I’m not good enough.” “I’m not strong enough.” “I’m not capable or worthy or smart or (fill in the blank) enough.” This, my friend, is what you’ve got to get to! And then once you start really becoming aware of them, you can start turning them around.
The thing is – as an adult, on a conscious level you most likely know that you are worthy and good and capable, for instance. But, our subconscious minds are 95% more powerful than our conscious minds. That’s why they’re running the show, so to speak. They’re running our lives.
So, do this little exercise to uncover your beliefs. It could take you as little as fifteen to twenty minutes. Or as long as you want or need it to.
Remember, though, with all the practices that I’ll teach you (if you like what I’m about and want to stick around to keep learning more) that nothing is ever a one and done thing. We’re like one big onion and our mission is to just keep peeling away those layers. Yuck. A smelly onion isn’t the best analogy here. But, you get the point. Discovering who we really are at our core is a life-long (amazing!) mission.
Here’s the exercise to help you discover your hidden beliefs around this subject
It’s taken right from my new book Finally Worry Free. By the way, you can get a free e-book of the entire book by clicking this link here.
Or you can buy the paperback version on Amazon at this link here.
- Find a quiet spot where you can relax for a little while. It’s best to have no music, tv, social media, etc. on around you. You’ll need a journal, notebook or just a piece of paper. You could just do this in your head, though. The easier you make it for yourself, the better. There’s no rules and there’s no getting it wrong.
- Think about this goal you want to accomplish. Don’t think about anything in particular in regards to it. Just let any thoughts and feelings come up to the surface. What’s making its way to the forefront of your mind? Any particular thoughts, memories or feelings around this subject? If nothing comes right away, that’s perfectly fine. You might have never thought of pulling things out of your subconscious mind like this before and it might feel a little strange. But, stay with it. Stay quiet and relaxed. Don’t try hard to think of anything right now. Just see what comes up.
- Let particular memories around this subject come up to the surface. Reminisce for a few minutes. Let those old scenes play out. What was happening? How were you feeling? Etc.
- Now, list some of the beliefs you formed back then on this subject. Write down around ten of them. These beliefs could be ones you’ve always been aware that you’ve had. Or they could be ones you are just discovering now with this exercise. For example, maybe doing this little exercise is making you realize that you’ve been hard on yourself ever since you were young around this subject. Maybe you’re realizing how much you’ve been comparing yourself to others. Or how you haven’t felt worthy enough deep inside.
- Let it all pour out. Give yourself this gift of awareness right now.
- Officially decide that you are going to start turning these beliefs around. Decide that you are worth this. Now’s the time.
- Take each belief you wrote down and create a new positive belief in its place. A belief that will serve you better. A good way to do this is to imagine your son or daughter or a little child is showing you her list of negative beliefs she has about herself. What would you tell her?
There you have it. Your first new step in achieving your goal is done. Take that list and put it somewhere where you’ll see it often. In fact, read it often to yourself. Start installing these new beliefs into your subconscious mind. More about this in the next article.
“Man is made by his belief. As he believes, so he is.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Thanks for reading!
If you’d like to get my newsletter, just click here.