The Best Beginner’s Guide to Affirmations

How to Make Affirmations Work

“The words you use are the instruments, channels through which the creative energy takes shape.”
Genevieve Behrend

The Best Beginner’s Guide to Affirmations

Have you heard about affirmations lately?

Have you heard that incorporating them into your days can be life-changing? That they can help you start clearing out all the negative beliefs you’ve been holding onto for years that have been holding you back from living the life you really want to be living?

That they are one of the main ways to start reprogramming your subconscious mind to become a WAY more happier person?

It’s all true. But, how do you go about starting to use them right?

That’s the question. And in this post, I’ll explain everything you need to know to get started.

So let’s talk about why you should start saying affirmations to yourself in the first place.

Why You Should Start Using Affirmations

Lets get something out of the way, right off the bat.

Did you know Jennifer Lopez uses affirmations? She actually swears by them. In an interview last year, she said affirmations are a big part of her everyday life. Not only does she say them all the time, she also has them written in different places in her home.

Jennifer Lopez Uses Affirmations

So I say if someone as cool as J.Lo swears by them, then anyone can get used to using them.

She’s not the only famous person who uses affirmations. There are plenty of well known successful people who have given credit to affirmations for helping them achieve their goals.

The second thing I want to say right now is that you’ve probably heard a lot of negative talk about affirmations through the years.

When I was growing up, the funny (and actually kind of creepy) belief we all had was that someone who talked to themselves was crazy. You might not be old enough to have heard this one, but that was the word on the street. Only strange and mentally ill people talked to themselves, supposedly.

Then there’s the real comical stuff about affirmations that has always been around. Remember the ‘Serenity Now!’ episode on Seinfeld? That was hysterical! Or the Stuart Smalley skits on Saturday Night Live years ago? He was this corny guy who had a cable tv show called ‘Daily Affirmations with Stuart Smalley’. It was so funny, I had to share a quick clip here:

But, the joke is actually on us. Because we all talk to ourselves. We have a running commentary going on in the back of our minds all day long. It’s essentially silent. It’s not like we’re having a full blown conversation with ourselves. But, it’s how our mind operates. And if you are not as happy as you wish you were – in any area of your life – then what you are saying to yourself everyday around that subject is negative.

So one of the best things you can do for yourself is to not only get past all the corny stereotypes you might have heard about affirmations, but to also just have fun with them. Sure, they are going to be awkward at first. Sure, you would never want to be caught saying them to yourself. But you know what else? They work!

You don’t have to make them corny. For instance, you don’t have to gaze at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself sweet nothings. You don’t have to use words that don’t resonate with you. You can just start using them as the powerful, down-to-earth tool they are.

And speaking of false stereotypes, notice above how I said to have fun with them? There’s another totally bogus belief that has always been around. That life is supposed to be so serious. Absolute phooey! Sure, there are serious things we all have to deal with. But, whenever you have a choice – make things light and enjoyable. Including affirmations.

Here’s someone else who used affirmations, by the way. Muhammad Ali used affirmations to help himself become one of the greatest boxers of all time.

Affirmations Are a Powerful Way to Help Change Negative Beliefs About Yourself and to Help Reach Your Goals

How many times have you tried to change something about yourself but we’re able to? We’ve all been there plenty of times. The reason it’s so hard is because we usually go about trying to change something about ourselves by just changing what we see on the surface.

The real cause is deep inside of us. Including our beliefs; what we’ve been telling ourselves everyday; the images we hold about ourselves; and the ingrained feelings around that subject. That’s what you’ve got to get to. And that’s why affirmations are such an important part of changing something about yourself and/or reaching a goal.

Our beliefs, thoughts, words, images, feelings and habits are all stored in our subconscious mind. And our subconscious mind is 95% more powerful than our conscious mind. That’s what’s running the show.

What happens when we are young is that we come up with beliefs – about ourselves, about others, and about the world – that get established in us deep inside. Some of these beliefs are positive and some are negative. It’s the negative ones that will continue to wreak havoc with us throughout our lives if we don’t grow out of them or clear them out and replace them.

How do you know if your beliefs are negative? Just ask yourself how happy you are.

“Your happiness is in direct relation to the beliefs you hold inside. Start uncovering your negative beliefs and then start replacing them.”

You’re an adult now. You’re not that little kid anymore. You know the truth about things now that you didn’t know back then. The thing is you might know the truth now on a conscious level – yet, those old beliefs are so ingrained in your subconscious mind that they you are still operating out of them. Time to turn them around!

One of the tricks to changing false beliefs around has to do with the fact that we have over 60,000 thoughts a day. It’s a numbers game. Think about a belief you came up with when you were a young child. Like: “I’m not good enough.” Now, think of how many times you’ve said this very statement inside to yourself through the years. Thousands and thousands right? And you’ve said it to yourself in many different ways. For many of us, self criticism is just a way of life.

So one of the secrets to affirmations is repetition. Saying a new affirmation, like “I am good enough!” to yourself a few times isn’t going to cut it. You’ve got to keep repeating it – a lot. Keep reading and I’ll show you how you can keep ‘sneaking’ these affirmations into your days.

Why Affirmations Actually Do Work

Have you heard through the years that affirmations don’t actually work? I have two things to say to this. First, is that the people saying this either don’t understand how our subconscious minds operate and/or are doing affirmations wrong. Think about it. We’ve been talking to ourselves inside all of our lives. This is how our minds operate. It’s how we translate our thoughts. So, wouldn’t it make sense that changing this self talk around actually does work?

I have a whole chapter on this in my first book, Simply Being Happy, that explains it all in detail. In it, I get into one study in particular that was conducted on affirmations years ago. I debunk their conclusions that tried to debunk affirmations. You can check it out on Amazon by clicking on the title above. It’s really fascinating. And my book has chapters and chapters on affirmations.

You can purchase the paperback on Amazon. And if you prefer, you can get the 290 page E-Book FREE by clicking on this link.

Here Are The Basic Steps to Affirmations

Typical steps:

● Become aware of a negative belief you have. Let’s say it’s, “I am unsafe.” Many people with worry and anxiety have this belief, wouldn’t you say?

● Then, become aware of when you might have created this belief. This doesn’t mean you have to remember every experience you ever had when you were young associated with this belief. Just try and figure out, if you don’t already know, when it was formed, how it was formed, and how you keep perpetuating it through the years.

● Decide that you are ready to change it. Explain to yourself why it’s a false belief that you don’t need anymore. Give yourself a pep talk. And make it good. You’ve been holding onto this belief for so long. And our minds naturally want to keep proving that our beliefs are correct. So this belief, no doubt, has had a big hold on you for a very long time. No measly explanation will do here.

● Create a new belief. Make it a complete opposite of the old negative one. “I am safe and secure.” or “I am strong.” for instance. Make it so it feels good to you. Like you are emphatically telling yourself something you wish you knew back then, but now you do.

● Incorporate it into meditation sessions at times.

● Speak it often to yourself all throughout your days. Write it out in your journal if you’d like. Write it on slips of paper and tuck them in different places where you’ll see them. Keep in mind that when you write it out and leave it around to see here and there throughout the day, your subconscious mind will take it in, even if you don’t pay attention to it.

Here Are The 4 Biggest Secrets to Affirmations.

This is what many people who teach affirmations leave out of their advice:

Believe: You need to believe the affirmation. If not, saying it won’t work. Let me give you an example. Say you need more confidence. That’s a huge one for many people. But, when you say, “I am confident.” you might not believe it.

One of the things you can do is customize your affirmation. Change it to something like, “I am becoming a more confident person.” “I am determined to become a more confident person.” “Little by little, I am gaining confidence.” This will feel truer to you and so it will work.

Eventually as this affirmation starts sinking in and replacing the old negative belief, then you can move up to other ones that you weren’t ready for before.

Encourage: In the example above, can you see how talking to yourself and encouraging yourself can really help. Be your own best friend. Be your own affirmations coach. Many people didn’t get enough of this as kids. Give this gift to yourself now.

You don’t have to have a full blown conversation with yourself in the mirror. Just sort things out and speak to yourself with as much love as you would a child.

Feel: Our feelings are the jetpack that fuels our affirmations. Say them to yourself with lots of feeling. Feel them in your mind and body. Shout them to yourself like you’re a cheerleader on the sidelines of a football game. Be that cheerleader for yourself.

No one has to know. Say them when you’re walking or jogging or exercising. Say them while you’re blasting music and dancing. Clap your hands, stomp your feet. Do whatever you can to give them the emotion and the energy they need to really overtake all the negative feelings you’ve had for so long.

Repeat: 100 times a day is good. 1000 is even better. I’m sort of exaggerating but, not really. Remember how many thoughts we have a day. Just sneak them in whenever you can. You can also record affirmations into the recorder on your phone and listen to them whenever you can.

More Tips and Tricks To Get the Most Out of Affirmations

● You always state affirmations in the positive. For instance, you don’t say, “I am not weak.” Instead, you say, “I am strong.” That’s because our minds don’t recognize the word not. But they do recognize the word weak. So, you’re implanting that word when you keep saying it.

There is an exception to this, though. If you use so much feeling and enthusiasm to your
affirmations, even if it’s a negative phrase, your mind will register with your feeling more than the negative word and it’ll work fine. Feelings always trump everything else.

● You can find lots of affirmations online that you can start using. But, definitely learn to create ones just for you. You are unique and no one has your life, your memories, your beliefs, and your goals.

● Affirmations are not only good to say when you have downtime and you want to install them into your subconscious mind. They’re also good right in moments when you are feeling worried and anxious. Have a pep talk with yourself. Come up with an affirmation in that moment. Really feel it and add a lot of energy to it, so it will overtake your scary thoughts.

● Change your affirmations up all the time. Keep installing the tried and true ones and keep creating new ones especially as you are evolving and as situations come up. For example, if you’re starting a new job, you might want to create affirmations to help you with confidence in meeting new people, in your skills, and in your strength in new environments, for example.

● Add humor to them. We don’t give enough credit to having fun and making light of things. Studies prove how powerful this is for us.

● You can begin choosing words that allow you to hone in on certain strengths. Words like ambitious, independent, capable, energetic can all turn into personal affirmations for you. Shop around to see traits in other people that you admire and aspire to for yourself.

● Another good way to choose affirmations is to think about what might have been lacking in your family as a kid. Maybe it was showing love or giving respect, for example. Maybe stability was lacking in your life back then. You get to begin installing these qualities now.

Combine them with beautiful visualizations of the new life you want to create for yourself. The world is your oyster. You are not stuck with old family patterns. You can change them.

● Make affirmations a part of your life now. I personally am so programmed to say affirmations, that the minute I get in my car, I automatically create one for the ride. Same thing when I’m taking a walk or a jog or anytime I’m alone. I use them for everything and anything.

To get my energy up; to change negative thoughts running through my mind; to get into a positive, appreciative mindset; to help me focus on and get excited about a goal; etc.

Here is the link to get your own paperback of my new book, Finally Worry Free, on Amazon.

Check out my related posts with videos included here:

Thanks for reading!

Feel free to reach out to me with any questions or anything I can help you with.


If you’d like to get my newsletter just click here.


Recent Posts